Find Where
You're Supposed
to Live
A workbook to figure out exactly where in the U.S. your dream lifestyle actually exists.
Most people pick a city
and hope it fits.
They pick the city their college friend moved to. Or the one that keeps showing up on "Best Places to Live" lists. Or the place they visited once on a long weekend and felt something.
That's not a strategy. It's a guess with a mortgage attached to it.
Where you live isn't just a backdrop — it's the foundation of your happiness. Your environment shapes your energy, your health, your creativity, and the way you see what's possible. When it doesn't fit, you feel restless and drained. When it does, life quietly starts working.
This workbook does something different. It starts with your life — the actual texture of your days, your non-negotiables, what you're moving toward as much as what you're leaving — and works backwards to a location that fits.
Work through each exercise honestly. There are no wrong answers. The point is clarity, not validation.
"You don't find the right city. You figure out the right life first — and then the city becomes obvious."
Describe your
ideal Tuesday.
Not your vacation. Not your best day ever. Your ideal ordinary Tuesday — the kind of day that, if you had it every week, would make you feel like your life is working.
Your ideal Tuesday
What time do you wake up? Where do you go first? What do you do in the morning, afternoon, evening? Who are you around? What does it feel like?
What does your Tuesday require?
Check everything your ideal day actually needs to exist:
What are you
actually leaving?
Most people know what they're moving toward. Fewer have been honest about what they're moving away from. Both matter — because if you don't name the thing you're escaping, you'll often recreate it somewhere new.
What's not working about where you live now?
Write freely. This isn't about complaining — it's about clarity.
Is this fixable without moving?
Sometimes the thing we think is about location is actually about something else — job, relationship, routine. Answer honestly:
The most common regret I see: people move for the wrong reason and bring the problem with them. If the issue is your job, moving cities might not fix it. But if you genuinely want a different kind of life — slower, warmer, more outdoors, more affordable — that's a location problem, and moving solves it.
Rate what
matters most to you.
Drag each slider to reflect how important each factor is in your decision. Be honest — not aspirational. Rate for your real life, not the version of yourself you're trying to become.
How important is each factor?
Compare your
top cities.
Write in up to three cities you're seriously considering — then score each one honestly against your priorities from Exercise 03. Use 1–10. Be brutal.
Name your cities
Now go back to your priority scores from Exercise 03. For each city, write a score next to each factor. Which city wins?
The city that scores highest on paper is rarely the obvious winner. More often, one or two factors dominate everything else. When I work with relocating clients, I always ask: "If you could only keep one thing from your list, what would it be?" That answer usually tells you more than any spreadsheet.
The deal-breaker
test.
This is the last filter. For each city still on your list, answer these honestly. If any answer gives you a sick feeling — that's information.
Answer these questions
1. Can you afford to live here the way you want to live — not just to survive?
2. Have you spent more than a long weekend there?
3. Do you know at least one person there who loves living there?
4. If nothing about the house was perfect but the city was right — would you still move?
You have clarity.
Now what?
If you've worked through this honestly, you have something most people making major moves don't: a clear picture of what you need and why. That's the hard part. The rest is execution.
Visit before you decide
Spend at least 5 days in your top city — not as a tourist. Rent in a real neighborhood. Shop at the grocery store. Drive the commute. Sit in a coffee shop on a Tuesday morning.
Get the right Realtor first
Not just any agent — someone who knows the neighborhoods you're considering and will give you honest opinions. Ask them what they'd tell their own family member about this move.
Tell Aja where you're headed
If you're moving somewhere in the U.S., I'll personally introduce you to the agent I'd call. No lead marketplace, no cold introductions — just the right person for your situation. My concierge service is completely free to you.
Rent first, then buy
Renting can be a short-term landing pad. But owning roots you into your community — it builds equity, it creates stability, and it lets you actually make a home that reflects how you want to live. Most of my clients who relocated happiest did it in that order.
Know where you're going.
Let's get you there.
Whether it's San Diego or somewhere else entirely — I'll help you figure out the next step.